What Should I Give to the Beggar?
I am sure many of my fellow middle class South Africans can relate to the following article, which depicts some of the experiences I (or those around me) have had with beggars. Unfortunately, in South Africa, it is very easy to become embittered about giving to the less fortunate.
When I was still at school, my family and I had a memorable experience. A man walked up to our car and told us he had broken his arm, but didn’t have the money to go to the doctor. He held out his arm to show us and, sure enough, the arm looked quite convincingly broken. We gave him money and he walked off (or so we assumed at the time) to the nearest clinic. The next day, a friend was giving me a lift, and we were on our way down the same stretch of road. To my surprise and consternation, the same man walked up to the window of my friend’s car, with the same story, holding out his arm. Clearly he had found me far less memorable than I found him.
The mystery was explained, once we had asked around a bit and gotten several accounts of this man's routine: we realised that he had figured out that he could press some tendon or nerve to twist his arm in an awkward way, that if held it just right, made his arm look undoubtedly broken. He had, apparently, been using this trick on the soft-hearted passers-by in the area for months. Let me assure you, being fleeced and taken for a fool is not something anyone finds enjoyable.
Moving on to beggars at the gate; I have been insulted, on more than one occasion, by beggars who asked for money, but were given food instead. A long time ago, I decided to give food when I can, but never money. This was in an effort to try and decrease the chances of my well-meaning contribution being wasted on drugs or alcohol. Unfortunately, it has happened on more than one occasion that the food was either thrown away, or given back to me in disgust. In case you think otherwise, the food I give to beggars is not of bad quality. It is food that I, myself, eat. So, I think it is understandable when beggars, people claiming to not have food to put on the table, do not want good food that is freely offered. What exactly did they want the money for then?
I recall one specific incident in vivid detail. A beggar had rung our bell and I had gone out to speak with him. He asked for help and I told him I would be right back. I went inside and packed him a bag full of food, which included milk, bread and canned goods (the type with a pull tab, that does not need a can opener). When I handed the bag to him, he grimaced, told me he wanted money, and threw the bread and milk out onto the street. I turned to go inside, more than a little disappointed, and as I was walking, he threw one of the cans of food at me in his rage. It hit me squarely in the back of my unsuspecting head (I required stitches in that case). Bitter seems a bit mild, but I suppose no good deed ever goes unpunished, right?
Another type of incident, something that has happened near innumerable times now, is that of a beggar ringing the bell and telling me a long and well rehearsed story about why he needs money. How about an example? Here is a memorable one from a month or so ago: “I came here today, from the settlement outside the city, to come and guard cars at the church. There was a funeral at the church, but there were not many people like I was told. Now I don’t have enough money to pay for the taxi back to the settlement, I only need R150, please.” Meanwhile, I know very well that there was no funeral at the church that day and that the church hires specific car guards on a regular basis, when needed. When a person lies to you, to try and coerce your pity and your money, you are less inclined to give him anything in my experience. Especially if you are the sixth house on that street that he has tried in barely the two days...
Often at a red light, I will see beggars specifically going to the windows of cars with white women behind the wheel, sometimes ignoring cars that have men or black people inside. Why is this? Do they truly believe only white people have money to spare? Or, more likely, do they know that women are more likely to feel bad for them; especially white women, who are very likely to have been made to feel guilty over the Apartheid era of South Africa (yes, white people in South Africa are systematically made to feel as if they owe a great debt to others).
When I tell a beggar that I will give him the seeds and training to make a small vegetable garden for him and his family, which can fit on a piece of land no larger than a door, I am almost always turned down. It is a skill I earned a good while ago, and one that has served me well in my own garden. Such a garden could very easily alleviate some of the problems that they and their family experience, particularly in times like these when food prices are higher than ever, but they turn it down. Why? I have my theories, of course, but lest I be accused of generalising too much or insulting the people I refer to, I will leave it to you and your conscience to take a guess.
Now why, when so many incidents tell me that it is nearly always futile to give, would I still want to give to those around me who are less fortunate? To simplify a complex interplay of emotions and logic, my humanity and desire to help often lead me back to giving where I can. So, is all of this complaining just railing at the injustice of it all, or do I share it to polish my public image? Neither.
I have learnt a valuable lesson over the years, even if I sometimes find myself not acting on it. These days I give to charity organisations, like soup kitchens: non-profit organisations that offer the homeless an opportunity to do a little work in return for a place to sleep and/or a meal. This way, I know that my contribution is not only appreciated, but used well, in ways that hopefully leave behind a little bit more than a fleeting good memory.
Here are a couple of examples of such organisations in South Africa:
ROKPA (Johannesburg)
Theo’s Soup Kitchen (Johannesburg)
Eljada Huis (Pretoria) (page is in Afrikaans)
The Haven Night Shelter (Cape Town)
This is how I help those in need. If you feel empathy for the plight of the poor and the homeless, I suggest you try the same. Perhaps, with enough time and effort, the people of South Africa will have much less need for charity and far greater pride in themselves, individually and as a nation we can be proud to call home.
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